Monday, March 11, 2019

Being alone and the impact it has on your survival rate, your health and quality of life.



Continuing with the line of thought of my post about preparedness as we grow older, I’d like to bring up another taboo subject.

Being alone.

Coming from a Latino culture, I fully understand the hesitation to even talk about something like this. You’re supposed to be tough, rugged and not complain about silly things such as feelings. Feeling lonely falls well within such category. Making matters even worse I actually do enjoy some alone time, maybe a bit too much. At last for people like me (and many in the survival community are this way) its dangerously easy to be ok with being along. In spite of all I also know perfectly well that without my wife and kids I’d be miserable.

A lot of people are very much alone, they do feel lonely and its not by choice.
Census figures show that one in 11 Americans age 50 and older lacks a spouse, partner or living child. That’s roughly eight million people in America.

The Loneliest Generation: Americans, More Than Ever, Are Aging Alone
We also know that being lonely isnt good for you, it directly impacts both your health and quality of life.

Loneliness Is as Lethal As Smoking 15 Cigarettes Per Day. Here's What You Can Do About It
What I do and would advise others to do is work at making these relationships work.
To that end, here’s my piece of advice of the day:

Work at making your marriage work. Work at having a good relationship with your kids. I’m lucky in that I have a great family and love wife and children. But I also admit it wasn’t all some lucky coincidence. I did go out there to find the right woman and didn’t settle for anyone less than what I wanted. Once I found her, I made the conscious effort to make it work, as a father and husband. We live in this screwed up, selfish and disposable society. People are just as disposable as relationships and we are told that’s the way its supposed to be. If you don’t want that to be you then act accordingly.

Work at making friends. This one is hard for me because I enjoy more being with my wife and kids than anyone else. Of course, I’m lucky in that regard (we already addressed the matter of luck when it comes to these things) but it also means I struggle a bit to get outside that circle and make friends.
I do try though, and trying enough you eventually have success. Do try to talk with people, do smile, say hi, engage in conversation. Even if it seems like silly small talk it is still social interaction that is good for you. It’s also about practicing that skill which you probably need to get better at anyway.
Just a couple things to think about people.

FerFAL

Fernando “FerFAL” Aguirre is the author of “The Modern Survival Manual: Surviving the Economic Collapse” and “Bugging Out and Relocating: When Staying is not an Option”

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Divorces are both a boon and blessing. My Brother has been divorced the past 15 years and though the beginning was tough, he now is comfortable being alone. His children, both now grown and out of the house no longer need him for daily needs. So his time is his own and he can work on things that need attending. His former wife demanded a lot of his time to take care of her but that game is long over.

BUT

As he ages, he worries about who will be around to keep tabs on him. Is he physically okay ? What happens if a medical emergency occurs ? He stays in good shape to minimize real risks, but it just takes one car accident and you are incapacitated. Now what ?

I live in a neighboring city, but my family needs my time too. So splitting it would be difficult. So yeah - friends do make things easier.