If you thought the tacticool fashion community was the silliest thing on Earth you’ll be surprised when you looked into some of the weirdos you can find in the new breed of wilderness survival, these days now in vogue and known as Bushcrafters. Not talking about Lofty Wiseman here and some others that are the real deal, I’m talking about these 20 year old something or older that just last year picked a knife for the first time in their lives, cut away a few chips of wood and discovered a new age lifestyle of some sort in what used to be called camping, hiking and wilderness survival.
I wont be mean and link to some of the posts and videos I’ve found on youtube under bushcraft, but how stupid can a person be? No offense meant to the guys over at UK, but some of the ones I saw by British folks are some of the most ridiculous. They talk about the innocent little Mora knife as if it were almost a nuclear explosive device. Folks, it’s a knife no bigger than a steak knife!… less than half the size of a cook knife, for the love of God if you’re afraid of falling over it and stabbing your femoral artery as you make a pointy stick just don’t use knives, or pointy sticks, or forks. I’ve watched some of the most stupid, most ridiculous techniques used to sharpen a stick, a soft and green one at that, as thick as my thumb. Warnings about Tennis elbow risk (when making a pointy stick with your green twig) were almost more than I could take. I’m not Mr. Bushcraft buy both my grandparents were carpenters. I’ve used knives and sharp objects for as long as I can remember, sharpened them (which seems to be a mystic lost art , even among these sort of bushcrafters) Helped my grandparents and my father make enough pieces of furniture, made and fixed some of my own (oh yes, I’ve even sharpened sticks once or twice) yet I don’t have tennis elbow. All this nonsense being said and done while dressing frontiersmen clothes. Videos on how to make a notch? What the hell? I understand that this silliness has a lot to do with the so called “knife crime” paranoia over there. As ridiculous as it is, it is being drilled into their brains and its understandable that this may happen after a few decades of such insanity. Sorry for the rant but its just amazing to hear people talk about knives as if they were loaded guns, specially when every kitchen in the planet has a dozen knives just as big. Seriously folks, the tacticool fashion queens have nothing to be ashamed of after what I just saw over on youtube.
The Bushcraft dude.
*The bushcraft guy Wears buschcrafty clothes of course. Earth tones and such for when in the woods. Makes sense. That way no one finds you if a stroke drops you there among the bush and leaves while you go camping and you need help.
*Buschcraft ego is indirectly proportionate to the size of the knife used. The smaller the knife, the bigger his bushcraft gonads will be. Preferably the knife will be a small necknife, 2” blade tops and replicating prehistoric stone knives. Cavemen had those small knives so that’s the best thing, right? Lets better not take into account that they were made of stone and anything bigger would have shattered when put to use, not to mention, they didn’t HAVE anything better to begin with. Everyone knows that stainless steel knives are no good. ATS-34, VG10, none of those steels are any good for bushcrafting, you have to use carbon steel.
*For starting fires, a firesteel is used. God forbid you from using lowly matches and lighters. Firesteel are more bushcraft type. Doesn’t matter that ferrocerium rods (Firesteel is one commercial brand) wasn’t invented until after 1880 and even common safety matches already existed by 1844. The firesteel throws sparks and stuff and looks cooler, like a caveman. But the real cool bushcraft guys use flint and steel (made by a bushcraft blacksmith of course) or fire bows. Of course this is a pain in the butt to use, starting a fire this way requires desert try tinder and the kit itself uses up ten times the space needed for a pack of 25 storm matches, a lighter and a Firesteel as backup, al put together.
As for knife safety,
1)The hardest part, an specially for some of the new Bushcraft types: Don’t be an idiot. This basically means, understand that sharp objects cut. Understand that if you do lots of strength against a particular stubborn knot you’ll likely end up moving the knife further away than expected when you get through it. That people shouldn’t be around, specially in front of you, when working with a knife.
2)Cut away from you and not towards you. Always. Your hand is still “you”, so your hand should not be ahead in the direction you’re cutting.
3)Always keep your knives and cutting tools sharp. Knives that aren’t sharp are more unpredictable and require more force to compensate for the lack of cutting ability.